TODAY, WE DRINK!
That’s all I remember saying when all hell broke lose. Everyone started downing their drinks. It’s the first day of a new year. I haven’t been much of a new year resolution person but this year I want to break all barriers. Go beyond every point I never would have. A brand new me for a brand new year.
For years at every event I go to, everyone around me would hold on to their drinks, caress the container holding it like it’s some fine damsel (or dude as the case might be) and just drink. I wanted to feel the way they felt every time they held whatever has the liquid they were downing.
So I decided to start this “new year new me ” bull by declaring “surplus”. I held that beauty and downed it like I had spent ages in the desert without water. 1, 2, 3 down..I still dey alright. 4, 5, 6 …I think I’m getting a little woozy. Plus the bladder can’t hold so much fluid. Darned weakling! Can’t you get your acts together while I drink!
New year, new me…bad idea. Its just 7pm…my bladder’s lost control of itself…and I’m purging my belly’s contents on a constant basis. Kai! All the tasty meals I ate don waste be that. This downing of fluids doesn’t go well with everyone’s system.
Here I am at a clinic now- new year new me. At least it’s the first new year’s day I would be in the clinic. So I’m trying to recollect all I drank and what could be wrong.
Fumman juice, that Chivita active thingy…one drink in a can that I don’t remember its name…another can with orange pulp and juice…
Argh! I know what is turning my system now. In a bid to make my own “Baileys” I mixed malt and milk. How could my stupor make me forget I’m lactose intolerant!
TODAY, WE DRINK!